Growin’ Up – a blog about life after Smith by Lauren Kaelin ’10 Reality bites

July 28, 2010

When I graduated I thought I would be independent.

But, in many ways I have never felt more dependent.

At Smith I was able to function under this guise of distance from my parents. I realize, however, that in retrospect, I was no more independent– just as reliant on their generosity, commitment to my education, and ceaseless support. But on the surface, I had my own room, my own job, friends, and relationships and I called my mom a few times a month.

I am not living at home by any means, and support myself financially. I buy toilet paper and coffee filters. But the fantasy I had about real life and real world autonomy has been largely disappointing.

Remember when in Reality Bites Winona Rider’s character is given a gas card by her distant father. It is her graduation gift and he says he’ll “pay that bill for a year”?

I wonder at what point I will “cash-in” and let my mom buy my coffee filters and refill the gas tank.


3 Responses to “Growin’ Up – a blog about life after Smith by Lauren Kaelin ’10 Reality bites”

  1. I know what you mean. You have your own world in college. And then afterward, you have to create a world from scratch — along with a new way of relating to and relying on (or not relying on) your parents.

  2. Amy said

    Maybe when you have kids you feel like an adult? I still call my dad for advice on retirement accounts and I’m starting to see that I might actually know more about this stuff than he does, finally… but that adult feeling isn’t always there.

    Anyway, stopped by after a link from Smith on FB. Congrats on the internship, even if it’s midwest! (It’s not so bad… sometimes.)

  3. Colleen said

    Yo- don’t hate on the midwest.
    Also, I enjoy bits of this blog.

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